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September 29, 2008
Question: My girlfriend is way too obsessive. She goes through my cell phone, emails, mail. She is way too clingy, boring, and not funny.
ANSWER: Clingy, boring, and not funny are okay some of the time. All of the time is intolerable. And pouring through your private stuff is way over the edge.
Wiz
September 22, 2008
Question: Hi, I have been with this girl for nearly 2 years now she is 3 months older than me. We attend different colleges. She has given up a lot for me as I have for her. I love her a lot. She is beautiful to me, although I see girls who are even prettier. I think they call them slags (lol).
I see her every day, but recently she has acted like she doesn’t want to find a job and just can’t be bothered with anything apart from coming to my house with me. She isn’t the smartest girl, so it’s not easy for her to get a job.
Help me, please.
ANSWER: Looks are only part of the picture. You will always see prettier women. Date one of them and before you know it you’ll start seeing prettier women again. Even the most beautiful girl in the world, after you date her for a while, will look less beautiful than some other girls. The reason? Because how good one looks isn’t everything. As you date your beauty over time, you will obtain more knowledge about her and see the things you couldn’t see when you first met her. She will fall from a goddess status to a human being. Then, when you date her and see other women, your mind will see them as goddesses while your imagination fills the knowledge gaps with wondrous idyllic visions of how great the other girls are. If you date any one of them, she will soon fall to human status.
Your girl is beautiful to you because you see her for what she is and you like her. That in itself is beautiful. The other girls are not all slags – no, but that is not the issue here.
Your girl is revealing a quality that she must improve on to keep your interest. If she clings to you and wants you to be her sole object of attention, and leeches off you for all her needs, you are not interested. This may be a temporary thing and may have nothing to do with leeching off you.
Some guys like constant attention and will tolerate a even leech, especially if she is a passionate leech, but most after a while find as they get older it gets tiring and even exasperating.
By the way, don’t confuse giving birth and staying at home to care for the baby with the qualities of a leech. They are quite the opposite.
It is all up to you. If she has enough good qualities to keep you interested, even if she clings to you to some degree, you might overlook it enough so it is not a problem. It might not last. If it continues and eats away at you, watch it to see if it is bad enough to break the relationship.
Wiz
September 20, 2008
Question: I don't like my girlfriend anymore and I don't know what to do. I've been going out with her for nearly 7 months and I don't know how to dump her. Please, can you give me some hints or pointers on how to do it nicely??
ANSWER: Dumping a girl after seven months is not easy. You can’t make it easy by following a few hints or pointers. The most important things to know are: 1) Be sure and 2) once you are sure, get it done.
There: two pointers that will help you accomplish the task. The rest depends on you and the respect you show her. Don’t tell her what was wrong with her. Don’t blame her for the demise of the relationship. Give her compliments, like “you are a fine person with good looks and personality” if you see things in gray, or like “you are the cutest, most beautiful girl I ever met, and you’ll knock the socks off any guy you meet” if you see everything in 3D and brilliant color.
Be clear about wanting to end the dating relationship. You can say that you’d like to stay friends even if that will be impossible. And, finally, do it quickly. Don’t mislead her into thinking you might change your mind.
Wiz
September 19, 2008
Question: I'm infatuated with an older chick. She is about 10 years older, but the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She is sharp, smart, funny, respected, powerful, divorced, and no kids. This girl also intimidates me some because she is confident and sexy. I am a loner guy, but respect smart and attractive women. I do not date, but get hit on all the time. Dating is complicated and I don't like the drill and kill. Most chicks my age or younger aren't that smart and ramble on and on. She doesn’t seem like the nagging type because she is independent, but she does ask questions periodically. We have had conversations because she gets frustrated that we have not gone out. I think about letting her off the hook, but when I don't talk to her I actually miss her and call her again. When we are together I don’t think about her age. She looks much younger than her years and men can't keep their eyes off her. When we are together we don't look like we’re 10 years apart. I am 28 she is 37. Some of my buddies say who cares, she’s not 48! I am not a mommy's boy, but I respect my mother's opinion. She probably would prefer me be with someone not divorced or older. I have not asked this girl out because . . . who knows. All I know is she is all I think about and I feel comfortable around her.
ANSWER: She’s all you think about and feel comfortable around her. You enjoy her conversation and think she’s a knockout. You don’t like the drill and kill of dating, but you are a little intimidated by her confidence and sexiness. When you don’t talk to her you miss her enough to need to call her.
The answer is simple. Don’t think about her age. You say you don’t – but mention it seriously. Don’t be intimidated by qualities you should be happy about, like confidence and sexiness! If she didn’t like you, well, those qualities might be intimidating, but she likes you. Go on . . . date her – she’s got rare qualities that interest you. If you don’t date her, you will miss out, and you can blame only yourself.
By the way – no guy should be a loner guy without good reason. You don’t have a good reason. Right after saying you are a loner, you say that you respect smart and attractive women. Does this mean you don’t date women because they “aren’t that smart and ramble on and on,” but when you find a smart woman you just respect her? Dive in, get cold and wet, and wake up. You’ve got this lovely, smart, confident, and sexy woman at your doorstep – and you are infatuated – and you won’t let her in? You know better. Ask her out.
Wiz
September 15, 2008
Question: I asked out a girl last week and she keeps on showing non-girlfriendlinesses to me! I want a snog but she lost her tongue in a car accident! WHAT DO I DO? (HA DOO DOO!)
ANSWER: She spoofed you with that one. What attraction could a girl have to your tongue, anyway? What do you do? Leave her alone and find someone else willing to show you her tongue.
Wiz
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